This past week, I was
struck several times by critical comments from people in my community spoken in
such a way that insinuated they had a better notion of how things should be
done than the way things were. Behind these comments was a layer of cynicism, or
as one person put it, a sense of disillusionment.
I am no stranger to
cynicism. As a generally sarcastic person, I find my sense of humor often
crosses over that invisible line between playful irony and biting criticism.
It’s something I’m actively working on. One of the most basic ways I’m working
on it is with the discipline of silence.
Sometimes keeping silent
about the way things are and the way things might be is a bad way of going
about things. It can allow injustice to thrive. Or, less egregiously, it can
allow inefficiency to run rampant. In such cases, so long as you’re speaking
the truth in love, raise your voices to the roof!
But sometimes we voice
our opinions just because we think we know better, without considering that
ours is one of a thousand voices expressing often contrary things to people
whose job it is to find what works not just for you, but for the whole. I’ve
noticed a remarkable lack in my conversations with people recently: a lack of
grace.
I don’t mean to suggest
this problem exists only “out there.” I’m one of the perpetrators too. I
recently let my opinion of someone I used to know out in the open. I expressed
the opinion somewhat comically, but it wasn’t very favorable. Then he showed up
and was perfectly kind and intelligent, and I realized I’d missed one of those
important opportunities to keep my mouth shut.
I should note that this
happens to me quite a bit. It’s rare that any of my preconceived critical
opinions ever lasts the test of time. I’m nearly always humbled by my ability
to assume someone or something is less than they are—less capable, less
intelligent, less worth my time.
This is one of the
reasons I’m trying to extend grace towards those who seem to be having trouble
extending grace themselves. Because heaven knows we all need it.
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