Amanda left last week. My book group moved on to the next novel. I got a cold. We moved from the house to the apartment so the termites could die for a few days. My tire blew (yes, that was a week ago), so I've been driving on a spare which is apparently also flat. Dad's fixing that now... while I'm sucking the hours away with Law and Order SVU for hours on end. I haven't watched TV in a few months (minus the obvious and usual NCIS every Tuesday night since the season started back up again), so it's been a little odd. Let me tell you, Mariska Hargitay is severely awesome. Rather a superhero, actually. Kind of not really human. Anyway, none of this is important - it's just what's been happening during the silence. Real life is in between, of course. Sweating up and down the apartment stairs, finding the necklaces Amanda left behind on a hook in the bathroom, staring down awkward situations in Portfolio, selecting only my favorite clothes for the three-day hiatus in the apartment, avoiding people, meeting them head-on, feeling antsy to do anything, feeling too lethargic to move.
Dear Nathaniel, I am microwaving pie that Mom bought up in Oak Glen this week on her way home from the orthodontist. As I put it in the microwave, I was full of sadness that I was not in Oak Glen with her. Why did I not go? I was working. I want to see the trees turn. I want to wander slowly through autumnal gift shops. Under the water, you cannot sense the approach of the seasons. Even here it is difficult because, after all, it's California. But I can still sense it. After three seasons in Illinois and one in Scotland, it must be with me for good. Or at least for a while. Because I am all abuzz with eagerness for fall and winter, for turkeys and dried leaves and Santa. I should start cooking again this fall. Fall foods are my favorite. Baked squash dripping with melted butter and brown sugar, pumpkin soup... this year, if I have enough money, I will put together a holiday dinner for my friends. And we will drink Scandinavian mulled wine, which is the most wonderful thing I have e...
Actually, Mariska is a great actress, a great person and a beautiful woman.
ReplyDeleteActually, Mariska is a great actress, a great person and a beautiful woman.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Anonymous. You really cut to the heart of this post. :)
ReplyDeleteI was once compared to Mariska Hargitay. If her partner didn't look so much like Bert (from Sesame Street) I'd probably watch the show more often.
ReplyDeleteI like her last name. Hargitay.
ReplyDeleteIt has a nice ring to it.
However, if you have the stomach flu, Law and Order SVU is NOT the show to watch for hours on end. Promise. And I hope you brought Mike with you. She doesn't like termites, I'm sure.
ReplyDeletemike is here, safe and unpesticided. happily, this morning's television offerings included one of my favorite audrey hepburn films, 'how to steal a million'. no law and order for me.
ReplyDelete